Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Happy Anniversary!

Happy 1 Year Anniversary

I can't believe it!

I missed my Sanniversary!

My Scleroderma Anniversary date.

I thought I would be a sap and ponder over all the life lessons I have learned and center myself to see where I am now, compared to when I was diagnosed - all that important "life event" cerebral emotionally stuff we do when important dates come. 

But apparantly I am not as sentimental as I thought - not a sap - not as profound as I thought I was.

I really (no joke) thought that would be a really important and emotional day for me. But the thing is...I think I went to Sam's Club that day!?!

I guess this is a good thing. Perhaps I have accepted my new life more than I have realized. Which for me,  is pretty huge.... 

I am not an accept-er of things without completely understanding them first. I have said this before, nursing school changed me into needing to analyze things until they make sense to me. 

The irony here is...This disease makes NO SENSE at all! HA! The Big S does not play fair, there are no rules, it is always changing, always progressing causing a continuous series of readjustments and life changes.

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water - The Big S will pull a presto-chango and the sharks are back.....so I am really proud of myself for forgetting my anniversary date!

As you may have figured out by now, I am a pretty cerebral person and I like to consider myself deep (again - My opinion - I also consider myself good at scrabble, yet I can't spell, so?)

I digress, so I thought that this mile marker would mean a lot to me. And it still may hit me, just not today. And apparantly - not on the 13th either (Ba Da Bum...Ching!)

Well, what can I say. I just remembered. It's been a year since I got the news that changed/is changing my life forever.

I have "The Big S" - but the big S doesn't have me!

It has been a crazy wild ride this past year.....diagnosis, job loss, depression, denial, grieving, hope, acceptance, joy, weight gain, medication changes, major life decisions and now the start of fall again tomorrow.

Life is good.

Last year my holidays sucked really bad (See I got scrooged) but this is my year baby! Mama Griswold is back in action.....bring on the holidays! Tomorrow is the first day of fall, and after that the onslaught of holidays, carnivals, festivals and fun until the new year and I can't wait.

So, I guess I have really changed. I am happy! I am excited and can't wait for the new season to begin. Bring it on!

Well, that's all for now folks. I gotta wash that grey right outta my hair (Salon appt) and then off to the gym (see said weight gain above!)

Have a great Tuesday! Enjoy your day!

Love ~



  1. Stacie,
    Thanks for writing to me. I can't find many people who have limitied. It seems that most of the bloggers have diffuse. My doctor does not believe in treating limited S. I am certainly considering another opinion, but a part of me does not want treatments because treatments have side effects.
    I really think that I should have the motility test repeated as I was tested almost 2 yrs. ago. I had my throat stretched shortly after the test. However, my swallowing has gotten much worse. Does your doctor plan to repeat the motility test? I don't know if I could live through it again.
    Did you test positive for ANA? Scl-70?
    Did I understand that you came to a halt on the 19th and could go to the gym on the 21st? You must be tough! Georgia

  2. Are you okay? You have not posted lately.

  3. Hi, I just wanted to encourage Annonymous who commented about her swallowing. I was diagnosed with Limited only a few years ago. They thought it was Systemic back in 1994. Swallowing is a huge problem for me. I let it go unchecked and have some problems that were missed. I haven't had a swallow study done in 3 years, but only because I have had speach therapy and have learned some techniques and exercises to keep me swallowing. I am due for an upper endoscopy that I usually have every other year. When I have lots of flare ups during a single year, the endoscopies happen annually. If you are thinking of seeking a second opinion, I encourage you to do so. I am now stable because I also have a secondary diagnosis of Sarcoidosis that was made in 2007. The meds used for that have kept me with a stable prognosis for over 2 years now. I definitly have my ups and downs. I did not find the right doctor until 2005. Be patient and picky. It pays off. Best to you and Stacie.

  4. Happy Belated SAnniversary Stacie!!!
    Congratulations on forgetting it! HUGE accomplishement:-)

  5. Thank You Anonymous and Boxed Wine! You two are so sweet, adorable and amazing!

    I am fine - Thank you so much for asking, caring and thinking of me.

    What a crazy - yet beautiful - thing

    I have lost friends since getting this disease, because of this disease, yet I have people that I have never met thinking of me, asking about me and showing so much compassion and warmth.

    You guys made me smile!

    No Im not gone yet! Although I wish I were in the Bahamas with my sister. Rrrr

    Here, just busy. I am trying to get caught up on the blog now while I'm feeling pretty good.

    Thank you again - You guys are tooo sweet

    I adore ya!